pending, execution pending

when I get the local crime news I think of Mexico as if the Mexican syndrome is happening to Serbia. the agenda is plain and simple: there is some kill, kill, kill, and then some steal, steal, steal, and then some more kill, kill. do I have no natural enemies in Serbia? I have to reinsure myself as of today, July 29^th 2019. it was around 13:08 when I was watching someone operating vehicle (looked like white Opel Corsa -not sure if this was the model & make- with some advertising lettering all over it) with license plates BG 929 TŠ (notice the double diacritic mark on this particular letter S which makes it different from the plain letter S) stop by my fence. the driver - unaware that I was watching him all the time - then extended a cell phone through the passenger side window and took several shots of the premises, my home. I wonder why ! he was up to no good, Im pretty positive.

when i should have been in Church .

i am not sure if this ( 0:03 ) was done on purpose but if i have to be the decider i must say it could have been: in 1895, namely, there were only two cars on the road in the entire state of Ohio and these two cars crashed into each other. luckily, i've been on the lookout since cutting off HAS BECOME a new dangerous habit in serbia.

they [some] know what’s going on and share it on fbook – Im only finding that out, occasionally by chance

there is not one joint in this country where i can feel like at home. 

i am afraid to drink plain water in many Belgrade coffee joints. but out of respect for those with whom I am sitting with sometimes I do - and then more often than not I find myself being sorry about it. it is agonizing to think about it let alone to suffer the symptoms of toxic condition. I took four sips of “water” yesterday and it then felt like I was drinking yukky rain water but soon thereafter within couple of hours I felt heavy and painful in stomach like something was eating out liver and whatever it was it came up my burning throat - i feel that something is going on down there [still acrid heavy] plus I got herpes. I do not know if my water was not plain but a cocktail instead – the mixture of water, some drain cleaner and spit, it is how it feels. it is the best description that I can imagine. my kidneys are hurting now, this morning my tongue was heavily white and throat feels like I drank acid; pancreas is giving signs of something as well. what lit the lamp and started me thinking that something (horrible to me) happened are serbian off topic and wry unrelated comments today on facebook from the unknown individuals of: oh it seems good for your liver – type like they are all onto something; otherwise, it is impossible to make connection between the liver and the issue they were commenting about in one logical manner. i am looking for those comments to screenshot and post them now but to no avail. it seems if you do not 'like' a facebook post you are reading, it is impossible to go back to find and access it again. it also seems that poisoning the enemy of the state as well as the enemy of the dear people is on some minds most of the time.

textbook douchebags

imagine a mental frustration of woman that was gang raped, if i can even compare,
not by the likes of Novak Djokovic and Leonardo Di Caprio, but by a lot of wretched men without a swag, that is what i am going through.
the fact that i am male makes it somewhat easier to bear, but it is impossible to be dignified man in serbia if you are toast on the national menu.
in Serbia I am way too transparent for any real type of success;

I cannot get married and have a family.
with this kind of malign rap sheet (social history given by a word of malevolent mouth in this community)
anything i would try to do like opening any kind of joint, gallery or restaurant is doomed to failure from the start. I TRIED AND I KNOW - through doing e-sale with low overhead - that's a fact. don't buy from him he is traitor, don't buy from him he is gay, do not buy from him, he is crazy, do not buy from him he stinks, do not buy from him echoes throughout serbia. it is called slander. but they do not care. i tried a musical project, got the same whiff. anything fails when you are targeted by the toxic majority. they knife trust your tires just enough
so they can explode at the right moment on the highway, they basically do not want you alive let alone becoming successful.

don't give no streets my name in this bloody city, i know how the routine goes, once you are a goner everyone suddenly becomes merciful.

i have no idea who the gentleman in the red vehicle is (in these images enclosed herewith) but this is what they do to me throughout belgrade. first off, you must consider the fact that this city (and country) is one big village and they all know me. when they see me coming a number of them is bending forward placing arms on top of their dashboards (pass the steering wheel) where I can see their crossed wrists gesture whereby usually wrists overlap one another visually simulating hands tied with handcuffs simultaneously suggesting imprisonment and lack of freedom I am pointing out to. you get the idea by looking at these images, this is the style. this is yet another one of their mind games and the way I am "brushed off" here. to top it all off, i've been permanently residing in this nerve wrecking environment for 17 years now, labeled traitor from the start. where have you been (living it up in the United States) when the Americans and NATO bombarded Us in 1999?

[The detractors and doers of targeted harassment are] bat shit crazy and unstoppable. only G-d can stop them in their tracks !

Novak Djokovic’s inspiring 20I9 Wimbledon wisdom helped me find out what to do. It worked today, and apparently it will work.

the favorite pastime of my fellow countrymen is to provoke those that were slandered beyond imagination; these detractors believe they are highly welcome to take part in some faceless shame-staking and guilt-binding. namely, this day I stood in line twice and when those who were waiting behind started making noises to disrupt me I channeled the ignorance and hatred of my fellow Serbs into my newly found strength needed to overcome this otherwise insurmountable psychological barrier. G-d seems to be Great again! the sunshine may be coming in. imagine a mental frustration of woman that was gang raped, if i can even compare, not by the likes of Novak Djokovic and Leonardo Di Caprio, but by a lot of wretched men without a swag, that is what i am going through. the fact that i am male makes it somewhat easier to bear, but it is impossible to be dignified man in serbia if you are toast on the national menu. in Serbia I am way too transparent for any real type of success; I cannot get married and have a family. with this kind of malign rap sheet (social history given by a word of malevolent mouth in this community) anything i would try to do like opening any kind of joint, gallery or restaurant is doomed to failure from the start. I TRIED AND I KNOW -  through doing e-sale with low overhead - that's a fact. don't buy from him he is a traitor, don't buy from him he is a gay, do not buy from him, he is crazy, do not buy from him he stinks, do not buy from him echoes throughout serbia. it is called slander. but they do not care. i tried a musical project, got the same whiff. anything fails when you are targeted by the toxic majority. they knife trust your tires just enough so they can explode at the right moment on the highway, they basically do not want you alive let alone becoming successful. don't give no streets my name in this bloody city, i know how the routine goes, once you are a goner everyone suddenly becomes merciful. the chances of prospering here are round like bagels going around in circles. if the likes of Nole share more of their global wisdom, I hope I will become free again. there are people that behave and perhaps think they are the new type of slave owners – with attitude and guts to intrude in your privacy and life, to stalk and disrupt your daily routine with signs, actions, noises… they have no right to make you think about things you are not liable thinking of. for example, i am a non smoker btw, a lot of them are brandishing a cigarette as they are coming across as if they want to point out to something very bad on my part. smoking a cigarette does not raise any issues of concern with me but to them it is apparently something terrible that should be disturbingly annoying to me. however, I draw a blanc every time. the only clue they raise is how they are trying to screw me by closing in a cig to their lips and inhaling a smoke with passion, making a scorning expression as if letting me know that I was done up but I am only like -- to hell with all these bastards. and so on, there are many more examples, not going to give any apes any more ideas. be informed and stop the newly launched human slavery, tyranny and fascism all around. I cannot fathom that's happening only to me. i will admit to any guilt except the notion that i am getting overly paranoid here. just enough.