in comparison to this part of world, trailer park seems like buddies

saved like zombie to buy a nice car and got lucky to buy what I wanted from a famous local tv star and watched like an eagle to remember every single mark and blemish on it...alas

after just four days there is a proof on it how much my serb countrymen are ignorant with respect to me. they would ruin me if they could completely. they are purely mean and completely – choose your wording here without exemption

there are several dings and scratches on it already, the thing that would not happen even if I left it in the center of Zagreb, Croatia with Serbian flag flying on it. I am sure this country is one of the worst places in the world at the moment.

these are the most jealous people on the planet. it’s a God’s punishment to be born around here 

last minute info, february 27th 2014: during my lifetime spent in USA, i've never - never experienced open hatred from anyone!!!!!!!! for more than ten years no black or white american has ever shown a personal hatred towards me (like for instance that  public figure i had written about that happens to be my neighbor in belgrade who initiated the serbs to spit at me) ....there were problems of different sort but never had a situation where i would enter my street and some 20 year old walking by would look at me with such unseen hatred, disrespect, and evil eyes, almost coming into my face for no apparent reason at all but to humiliate me - just like it has happened this evening in serbia. i cannot criticize secret services here, those who produced this situation whereby my family was destroyed while i was still in the united states. serbs  know they owe me a lot - so they are trying to kill me by pushing all these hordes of young serbian maniacs and psychopaths against me. that's the easiest way to get rid of somebody. 
it's hard to forgive those i deemed to be friends for letting this happen to me. i feel almost as if they conspired with this serbian cold-blooded machine that separated me from my happy family back in 2002. even though my situation is terrible here in serbia, i have no intentions of running back to united states. i wish if russia persuaded serbia by sending a group of instructors that would teach serbs how to behave as civilized men. i mean russia, if united states cannot do so. i fear being outside as i had never feared in my life before. i feel totally unsafe, i am disgusted with this monstruous, irrational mass of people, their unjustified hatred, animosity and a lot of other inhuman things they sport. someone has to bring this country to some norms and i am the right measure to vouch if anyone had succeeded in doing so. i got to this country in 2003, and for several years i did not feel anything specially unusual; however, this forced and artificially produced hatred (by the Serbian government) has picked up in recent years for reasons unknown to me!

instant serbian heroes

In order to criticize his own people one must be 
Prophet Jeremiah, Nietzsche or Shaw, 
while to criticize others, one could be a simple primitive.

I have got a house here that grandpa built and my ancestors were like ten times better off in comparison to me. Here is the clue: without the problems I have described I wondered where would I be. I cannot recall any similar example in modern history of mankind where someone was targeted and exposed to targeting in civilized environment whereby almost anyone could spit at you.
didn’t write sooner cos i figured writing brings more hate, more problems….it stinks man; i almost feel like a human prostitute around here, around this fucking city. i feel their spit and slime and by doing that to me - they think they are immediately raised to the ranks of Serbian heroes. the spitting thing was all started by that bloody Montenegrin neighbour (shall write about Montenegrin conspiracy later). another neighbor mr. popovic rented a room to a female student that goes berserk on the street whenever she approaches me. i am truly afraid of that young person acting crazy and by those who told her stuff about me (stirring job) and there are tens of hundreds more of these people that are dying to upset me in the same fashion in serbia. jerks can act crazy and make all kinds of noises but they cannot spit and pollute my drinks as they do. 

i would forgive united states of america for letting american serbs and serbs from the local/domestic - serbian secret services ruin my family (had happened 12 years ago with irreversible consequence) if they somehow managed to secure additional twenty years of normal life for me in serbia.   

this would be THE DEAL.

even though, i lost much thanks being to the united states of america and serbia, i would be okay just to live normal undisturbed life but it is hard to secure even that to me.

as a free man, i want to reinstate my life and dignity. 

then there is an abominable horror and unexplainable hate on the part of montenegrin and serbian art world mafia. 

otherwise, i am not returning to america, not even in twenty years, it means i am not forgiving. i will stay with these fucking motherfuckers absorbing their hatred, spit and slime. God will pay everything back, there is the universal justice, and i am sure all those connected to ruining my life - felt it somehow, and it is not going to end soon. on my part, i have not ruined anyone’s life, i hopefully won't and i am truly happy about it. it's better being alive victim than doomed predator, anyhow. i feel God will chase them to the bitter end with unstoppable force.

also i am hoping that united states will stop being cowards and finally reveal what happened to me so i could proudly look at this beastly aggressive serbian masses, as i am their victim and scapegoat.

they messed up the God's plan, the logic and reason of the Universe. serbs are so disunited that i am sure one Navy Seal platoon with aging marchinko can conquer the entire country. that is the only way one can explain strange things happening to me in the past twelve years. does anyone have drive to manage this nation and tell them enough has been enough a long time ago. so if i cannot live a normal life in serbia, cut the light and power out this land completely so noone can have normalcy around here as well. and by this i mean skull and the bones, skull and the bones, skull and the bones, in command. i can lay my head on the chump as st. John did; there an't one person who can manage and police the wild ones of serbia. which means, i am doomed to what the united states and serbia prescribed for me 12 years ago when they opened up a can of worms on me, which implies never a peace of mind, never a moment of normal, happy family life, never a moment of truth, never a moment of God's blessing. Will God tolerate this forever?
then i also think whatever the hell happens to them, they deserved it. they have been presenting themselves as mortal enemies for the past 12 years or so.