SERBIA - LITTLE HELLHOLE ON EARTH

it boggles my mind when i realize that i live in a zone of no good criminal and hooligan mentality whereby serbian mindset operates and thrives on omerta principles relevant to hell's angels and cosa nostra syndicates; the most popular government-supported rap group in serbia has "the syndicate" in its name and it is unheard of that one legit government and its ministry of sport promotes and supports a group of rappers that promote violence in their brute vocal skill, and most likely in lyrics, as for example this "syndicate" publicly follows out almost every sport event when serbians win in something, not to mention that even serbian prime minister Mr. Vucic was once a football hooligan himself. when you hear their songs it is in my opinion a type of growl similar to what Mr. Custer last heard when dying in pains somewhere in eastern Montana plains. it is disgusting and awful and the manner in which it was performed and presented promotes violence and models and manages public behavior....(.)....when the order is given that someone is maimed or harassed in serbia all serbs swoop down on that person like scavengers on their prey, you do not know where the hits are coming from, and unfortunately that is my reality; though in this kafkaesque Im not sure anyone knows why are they targeting me, no sobering thoughts here. my name - it is what they do to the artist in serbia. i could write a book about it but i do not have a time for that, my only goal is to evade evildoers and wrongdoers that enjoy such a massive power and support here one way or another. it is a hard, unpleasant and almost certainly impossible job. serbs live in serbia. there is a one side to it and not anyone out there to protect me except this blog. while serbs believe that "my masters - americans and croats" pat me on the back for what i do and write here, im just trying to fight a losing battle not for my liberty to speak out - as you can see nobody is bringing this blog down and im not in the mental hospital as some serb intellectuals are suggesting how i should be dealt with - but for my freedom to be left alone living with scars. that is right. my scars are real and im for real. that is why i do not get out much, the quality of my life is zilching zero, i feel like i have been preyed upon and monitored 100% of time and as soon as i get out it feels like the signal goes out too, go get him!!! if you cannot conjure it, it is metaphorically speaking quite similar to what you had seen in mad max part one, when the main character, who was btw able to defend and protect himself, was chased by the gang of outlaws. nobody can stop them in their ordeal and they are very cunning folk, it is impossible to deal with someone when there is a method in their madness.  
a possible solution:
as a compensation, i am not asking to become an ambassador of serbia in the united states.
whoever is willing to try to end this 'maltreatment' should open up the secret police and military
files and explain to serbian public that they are barking up the wrong tree as
in order to punish me for going to america instead of fighting in dirty civil war
the united states' authorities were wrongly and malevolently informed of my presence there by their serbian counterparts
while my last name was mispelled to match those
implicated in the war crimes which ruined my family in the united states as well.
in the minds of serbian warhawks (now aka unredeemed extremists) i bet this simple a.w.o.l. should not count
as some great crime esp. since im not important to anyone. many of them helped their children by sending them abroad. i can then
make an agreement to serve some time in the house arrest for a.w.o.l. to make up to the serbian state while at the same time the state
should compensate me somehow.
i would love to trade time that i owe to the state of yugoslavia (now serbia) for what they owe to me.
the problem: i am now at the disposal of the system that framed me in the first place but the one that did not go through a complete overhaul in its recent past. im really afraid, that's why im writing. let's pretend that the system was changed, however, some people are the same and now in the role of extremist unredeemers together with their associates and sympathizers - they are like KKK used to be in the Southern U.S. stronger than the state; the difference being Serbian KKK is anti-American and pro-Russian (on paper) and the time of existence. and they are strong, otherwise i would not be writing, since people like me have got general type of problems everywhere, even in best places on earth but still they are not writing about it like me. so these guys, the unredeemed extremists, suffered a military trauma and im sure they are up to no good and to compensate for their loss they enjoy teaching lessons - it is what my problem is  revolving around. this situation is not normal. i feel like someone's punching bag and a helpless scapegoat.
on their side, im rather perceived as a potential security threat and that is why nobody wants to leave me alone. there is a little bit of conscience involved in as well
but an issue of damages is also on the table.
i think it is almost impossible to prevent all further attacks on me. im the target that has got no future, no true liberty in the future as far as serbia
is concerned.
not to mention that my public treatment is sometimes worse than that done to any criminal. 
last minute:  of course, as i was expecting public harassment and persecution was intensified on january 11th following the publishing of this post on january 8-10, 2015.
im not saying majority of serbs are rotten eggs and apples and all people here are bad but great many many many many of them are. what on earth i had done to push this serbian public on witchhunt that lasts 12+ years. the only logic behind could be that people hate those they wronged and instead of explaining what cannot be reasonably explained as to why and how my family was devastated and ruined in philadephia, the united states - someone is pushing the never ending agenda of "get that guy" or rather, as I feel, they are most likely saying "get that son of a bitch, do not give him a time to rest" to prevent that the terrible facts of injustice and 'persecution without prosecution' come to light. it is a terrible pity that some serbs want to become serbian heroes by maiming me.

even on second day of Christmas which in Serbia is celebrated on january 8th, the holiday which by itself implies peace, remorse and humility as i exited into yard around 16:00 PM Serbian time, i immediately felt stricken into the right eye by a laser distance-meter or some other sort of power laser from the neighboring buildings as the vision problems and eye pain progressed late into the night (im updating this article). im writing this as it seems some serbians are on 24-7 watch by their windows while doing irreversible harm seems to be the greatest serbian past-time. they may be teenagers, but that does not change my view on serbia neither it washes off serbian hands with respect to me. then again what is the point of powerful flood lights directed into my windows and doors overnight by some of these "neighbors"?!!! in addition, im perfectly aware that by standing up for my rights in serbia and against public harassment and persecution, im triggering a whole array of copycat attacks and my situation is going to be even worse. serbs, like i do, wear their heart on their sleeves and just imagine if you would be critical of isis in lybia or badmouth sicilian mafia in new york city with or without reason; serbs in serbia can reach you.

even as earlier today i had gone into maxi delhaize supermarket on vojvode stepe blvd in belgrade, the same happened on the check out as the new cashier working on the line adjacent to where i was standing seemed to had a task of pointing and aiming her laser price scanner into my eyes. what is worse they think it is funny and apparently there is a call to do harm across the board. they are having fun the serbian way which is reflected in doing irreversible harm to somebody. this point of doing harm for fun is interwoven in the post-communist serbian society, education and culture (just watch some serbian movies like the infamous "serbian movie") and it starts out in the primary school - i witnessed it as i was the victim there too though i must highlight im a far cry from the victim mentality, if there was not a problem i'd never raise my voice. it is the method that degrades society and makes human monsters - entirely different from all other places i went to or visited inclusive of France, Austria, the United States. people that do unprovoked harm, beat people to death without reason or harass those they do not even know should be called by their real name, they are not serbs, they are monsters, indeed. but instead for some strange reason it seems those that do harm or are bragging about their ability to do harm enjoy great popularity in serbia. this relationship reminds a lot of the insecure young lady and her protecting mack daddy. my point is strictly subjective as couple of years ago i barely made it alive during one such attack and the attacker is still unknown to me while serbian police did not do anything even though i provided information on attacker's car plates which tells me that they are highly biased, protective and selective in their profiling.

what strikes me is that some of those that are expressing hate on the regular basis are actually going to church on holy days and Sundays. i cannot understand that someone who believes in God can be full of hatred.

if I lived anywhere else but serbia, this little hellhole on earth I would probably not be creating art because nothing would trouble me; with a complete peace of mind I would drink my coffee in peace. comes to think of it, I wish I was stupid much and not from serbia. i simple do not belong here.