still jaded.

this receipt was held by

to 99,9% people it’s nonsense, but it is an amazing thing to me.

the minute i saw her on the night shift tonight, i immediately went into a panic attack and in the end i decided to hang around and even got checked out by her.

to me it is crazy she does not realize that i am the only man on the planet that would give 100% respect and effort to her, sincerely – positively. all effort in. she respect me for all the time i devoted to her, i can see that, but she basically does not like me or i am simply not the right type of guy, right off the bat for her, i’;d say.

i needed marija this year as inspiration for this book, but i’d be ready to marry her this minute if she’d wanted to. or to put it mildly, devote my life to her and appreciate marijah to the fullest degree with 100% understanding like nobody else would, truly. do i know what it means to devote one’s living energy to someone, going places and making rounds for years. and what it takes to do that? it gets boring, so people lie to score, but this would have been my commitment like religion. if brothers helped me bonding this liaison i’d be deeply indebted to them as they’d save my life somehow. because i do need that other half – so far they were killing me. as of now on i do not know what their position will be. God help me.