WALKING WITH THE GREATS

while i am walking, i am thinking. while taking a shower i am also thinking. when i was driving i used to come to some great ideas.  

this evening around 22:45 as i routinely proceeded to maxi store (open 24-7) i felt i was walking with the all-time earthly greats en-route. was not feeling i was going to meet marija in the store and i felt they were there to console me. it was like an army of souls (people). unable and not powered to change things to better in this world, though.

and i was right. in the store there were only sofi – a girl from yesterday - and a fat lady manager who briefly flashed a price scanner's laser light into my eyes just to make the point that there are no exceptions to the rule. i realized then these people do not even realize who comes to their store. for goodness sake, i am making a history over-here and they have no consciousness of it whatsoever. if i would do the justice to america and reappear there again i would've been a billionaire. the yankees would king me if i’d do that. that’s why i am afraid because they’d kill rather than allow me to stay in serbia for good. in other words, i got no secret plans.

here, i am opening Heavens to them and they treat me like shit - nobody knows any serb outside of serbia but vlade divac, Novak djokovic and me. or i have been misleading myself in the last fifteen years of my life. yeah, perhaps it was all just a dream. at any rate marija was not there and i had my chances with her. i managed to ruin them all to no avail. God, damn it. if she fell into trouble because of my blog i swear i am going to help her no matter what, if it takes jumping into the fire - shall go into the fire. btw, chances that are given do depend on their recipients, i gave them to people, they do not know what to do with them; God gave them to me and I did not utilize them. like my friend said, strike while the iron is hot. to my dismay, i did not. at any rate, i’ll keep marija’s character whoever next comes into my book. at least i’ll have an opportunity of measuring what an impact she left onto my life by the sheer appearance. this because things may be easily mismanaged and i get to never see her again with no idea where to start looking at. perhaps at this hour she is with somebody and i am wasting my time. perhaps i am just an idiot. i am fiddling with a thought of leaving my mobile phone number here for her perusal just in case she ever tries to contact me. here go my emails: topspin@sbb.rs and chase4lead@yahoo.com 
well, if she ever wanted contacting me, she's got ways. pink and blue herewith have got a symbolic meaning because as far as i could remember that's a color pattern of socks she likes most, wore them all the time. no kink pun intended as this girl means to me now more than i can imagine - infatuation she is not. 

FOLLOW UP ON JUNE 17TH 2013: 
it seems like every fucking little dirty serb would like to have a piece of me, but it an't oh so important. i've never seen so many jealous motherfuckers and vultures ready to feed off of the dead meat!
i might have thought that americans were stupid, aggressive, evil, uneducated and crazy (being advised; heard or read; it was not my own conclusion) but there are too many worms let out of the can here in serbia that there is no comparison. i would immediately trade my habitat for a place that nearly resembles america because these guys here are simply unbelievable. in addition to being judgmental beyond belief, they are wild without anyone able to control them, anyone able telling them to stop when they need to stop. they just keep on going and going, crazier and crazier into the abyss and it is dirty hard to believe. i am sure there are nations who will listen to their leaders when it is necessary for example if they have to join EU and stick with the agenda. not serbs.
it almost feels like a crying time, not because they do everything to prevent me from seeing marija ever again, but hey... okay let's live to see what the downfall of this group of characters will be. 

just wasting my time writing about the motherfuckers who don't deserve respect. here is minor example of the bitch that's usually coming after me for no apparent reason whatsoever:
here's proof that i was in that store today -- Viva Ka Pharmacy in Njegoseva 90, Belgrade, Serbia
clerk's name is ana cirkovic. judging by what she did, she obviously knew the laser light would upset me but dear Mother of Lord she is pharmaceutical technician, she should know better than that!!! (or she is perhaps following advice from my personal enemy dr milan prostran's sister milica prostran who runs pharmaceutical association in serbia) i mean she blatantly - and this was happening on previous checkouts here too - pointing the red scanner laser light into my eyes for about 5 seconds like her only intention was to (temporarily?) blind me. i felt that she was really enjoying that like a perverted mind. next thing i know after i had asked the bitch about the expiration date on bionime refills for sugar tester (it is the only pharmacy i know that sells these) she coughed scoffingly as i was exiting after i had only noticed that i couldn't spend 100 refills in the following three months. what would you think of serbs if you were the well-known picking target (in the city - free for all) and hit by the laser beam for 5 - 6 seconds and experience temporary flash-blindness and afterimages that last even now eight hours after. (note: this was definitiely a laser because infrared and ultraviolet laser beams are not visible and thus by definition cannot cause glare, dazzle or flash-blindness.) i have a large floating dark spot in field of vision and a feeling i have the bulge in my left eye that is about to explode. 19:50 on 18th of June 2013. some serbs surely do not comply with the normalcy that living in EU requires. however, stated example is nothing in comparison to what i usually experience around here.