MARIJA (FOLLOWING UP_) PLUS 2 UPDATES FROM 6TH AND 7TH OF JUNE 2013

do not take me too seriously because i do not know if i am in love with maria or with someone else and for that reason i may not be fully right
i have no idea what i want, i cannot break it and make it even though i know i have to  
in that sense only, i need help 
 oh Lord, where you at now when i need you most

WELL, MARIJA (IS) THE MEGA STAR NOW. I AM TALKING BELGRADE, SERBIA. WE COULD HAVE BEEN THE BEST FRIENDS ON THE PLANET TOASTING TO THE EXTRATERRESTRIALS UNDER THE MOONLIGHT. WE COULD HAVE TRAVELLED HERE AND THERE, GO OUT TO DINNERS, READ BOOKS TOGETHER... I COULD HAVE EDUCATED HER. FOR CHRIST SAKE, I AM AN ART AFICIONADO. YES, WE COULD HAVE BEEN... NOW: THERE IS NO FREEZING CHANCE IN HELL, NO DESTINY, NO FATE FOR “LET’S GET IT ON BABY”. IN ADDITION, A HUGE PROBLEM I AM ENCOUNTERING IN THIS SERBIA COUNTRY WHERE EVERYONE I AM COMPLAINING ABOUT THINKS HOW TO SNATCH A MILION DOLLARS OR BEAT SOMEBODY UP IS – NOBODY I KNOW SPEAKS ENGLISH, AND, I THINK IN ENGLISH. MARIJA - I AM SURE - DOES NOT. WHEN I TALKED TO HER IN THE PAST, SHE COULD NOT EVEN HEAR ME, MY SERBIAN VOICE IS SO MELLOW AND GAYISH, LIKE MIKE TYSON’S. SERBIAN BIRDS DISLIKE THOSE THEY FIND COULD BE PUSSYWHIPPED. HOWEVER, ONCE I DRINK COUGHOH IN THE MORNING I CAN OUTLOAD MINNESOTAN GOVERNOR, JESSE... WHAT'S HIS NAME. SURE SHE THINKS I AM A SISSY LIKE THEY ALL DO. HER YESTERDAY’S LOOK (JUNE 5TH 2013) COULD HAVE KILLED ME. FUCK. I DON’T THINK SHE CAN STAND MY PRESENCE ANYMORE PLUS I WAS NOT PREPARED MENTALLY TO SEE HER. I TRIED COMING CLOSER YESTERDAY AT MAXI (DELHAIZE FOR THE RECORD) JUST TO TAKE A GLANCE FROM A CLOSE PROXIMITY AND SHE SHOT STRAIGHT TO THE MANAGER PROBABLY SCREAMING CUSTOMER MOBING. SHE KNOWS. THAT’S WHAT I IMAGINED, AT ANY RATE, BOOM SHE WAS GONE. THE MOMENT I SAW HER, SHE DISAPPEARED LIKE A FART IN A FAN FACTORY. TO MY DISMAY, SHE IS GETTING TO BE IDOLIZED BY THE HOOLIGANS WHO COME TO THE STORE JUST TO SEE HER. THANKS GOD – TODAY IT WAS THE WRONG ONE THERE WITH THE SAME NAME TAG ‘MARIJA’. FORTUNATELY, THEY DID NOT KNOW IT WAS NOT HER, BUT THEY LOOKED READY TO COME AT ME AT ANY TIME. IT WAS NOT SO SCARY BUT IT MADE ME THINK. WHY DO I CARE ABOUT SOMEONE THAT DOES NOT GIVE A DAMN ABOUT ME LIKE MARIJA. IT IS CRAZY MAN. THESE IDIOTS ARE NOT AFRAID OF NOONE NOT EVEN OF GOD NOR CIA. NOONE CANNOT CONTROL THEM EXCEPT THE RAW POWER OF THOSE THAT HAVE MONEY IN SERBIA. FEEL LIKE T-101. FOR YOU READING, IF YOU WANT -- LET IT GO OFF YOUR CHEST, CRY IT FOR ME. I AM TOO FUCKED UP BY TII MANY THINGS THAT I CANNOT GET A LOAD OF MORE TROUBLES AND IT IS CONSTANTLY COMING AT ME…HOT DAMN! GOD SEND ME SOMEONE THAT SPEAKS ENGLISH, POHLEASE (AN'T THINKING I AM GONNA BE STAYING ROUND HERE FOR TOO MUCH LONGER, FEEL LIKE MY MISSION IS ALMOST OVER)

UPDATED ON 6^TH OF JUNE 2013: PARADE OF SERBIAN HEAVY SCUM (ON MY WAY TO THE STORE)

LIVING WITH SERBS I AM GETTING USED TO THEIR BRUTAL WAYS OF LIFE AND CRAZY IDEAS. FOR ONE I CAN SAY THEY DO NOT LIKE WHEN SOMEONE OPENS UP, SPEAKS AND WRITES FROM THE HEART. THEY PROBABLY LIKE WHEN ONE IS SPINNING A YARN AND MADE UP STORIES. SO NO QUAKER SERBS, THAT’S FOR SURE. I DID NOT FEEL SORRY FOR WRITING MY POST YESTERDAY, HOWEVER, GOING TO THE STORE THIS EVENING WAS ONE OF THE TOUGHEST EXPERIENCES IN MY LIFE. I ENCOUNTERED SCORES OF SERBIAN SCOUNDRELS ON MY WAY TO AND IN THE STORE. I HEARD AND SAW EVERYTHING FROM MEOWS AND CATCALLS TO THE CRAZY LADY DANCING BEHIND ME WHILE WAITING AT THE REGISTER. I WAS DEFINITELY DISTURBED BY THEIR ACTIONS BUT DID NOT GIVE IT AWAY. I BLUSHED THINKING WHAT SERB-BORN HELL IT WOULD HAVE BEEN HAD MARIJA HAD TO SEE THIS 'UNDER THE GUN EXPERIENCE'. LUCKILY, SHE WAS NOT WORKING TONIGHT AND WAS NOT THERE. I AM SURE THEY WILL NOT ALLOW US PEACE OF MIND EVEN THOUGH WE COOL (WE NEVER DID ANYTHING OTHER THAN EXCHANGED COUPLE OF MEAN LOOKS, COMES TO THINK OF IT NEVER EXCHANGED MORE THAN A COUPLE OF SIMPLE SENTENCES; THIS SCORE NEVER SEEMED  TOO PROMISING, THOUGH). DO NOT FORGET, FOLLOWING THE WWII SERBIA (SUCCESSOR OF YUGOSLAVIA) HAD TORTURE-CAMPS FOR POLITICAL PRISONERS WHO WERE BRUTALLY TORTURED AND MURDERED WITHOUT MERCY. THESE THEME WAS NEVER BROUGHT UP TO BE SCRUTINIZED UNDER CONSTITUTION. THE KISS AND KIN OF THESE GUYS WHO WERE IN CHARGE IS A HUGE TEAM OF PLAYERS TODAY. SO ASKING MERCY OR FAIR PLAY FROM BAD GUYS DOES NOT SOUND LIKE A VERY PROMISING IDEA.   I SMELL MORE HARASSMENT. NOT LOVE

ANOTHER FOLLOW UP ON 7TH OF JUNE 2013:

Way out of my situation would be if my in-laws were the members of Sicilian mob. There is no other way anyone can explain to Serbs to leave me alone. Perhaps I do it with this blog, not. However, there were some improvements made as of my last post, that was yesterday, however, it polarized those attacking me. The majority was mellowed down, but the extremes are getting more radical. They are going to utilize every opportunity to come near me and provoke attack. They are itching to kick me or hit me without warning. I have seen it today. Well, I lost couple of friends and acquaintances today as the direct result of this pressure. People just do not want to be in the center of trouble and destructive attention. They do not want to be near or associated with me. The only way I can continue with normal life flow - inclusive of supporting friends and family - would have been if some foreign authority – let's say CIA or even Vladimir Putin for that matter – gets involved in the center of trouble and directs things in a way they are led towards my well-being. That will prove the point for some really good Serbs to stay by me, near me, love me, marry me, etc. Marija and I will surely benefit, even though this would have worked when I was in love with her. I feel local authorities are not willing to do this; they are there to get me. No good can come out of them ever, they are just messing things up, they thrive on confusion and live off the enhancing intrigues. I feel as being in the prison since losing friends to my situation equals to that saying the prison shows the true colors of your friends, though I can fully understand them and I am comfortable with their decisions. We are all scared. Well, another thing that can be a way out of this crisis corner is to make me an ambassador of Serbia for the United States of America - USA. Well then, I think I will be able to negotiate about forgetting ruined life and family they did and we shall see if we can start off fresh again and be able to look at each other as human beings. This is certainly not a life long proposition - it has a term I know, but still this is a chance for everybody. Otherwise, 'the decline' will  continue and, naturally, no good will come out of it. Another thing is, cannot scream justice without being just. We must level the things up, do some leverage. I see many counter arguments coming on the part of jealous zeros that hold some positions of power so this decision must be made from the top. Some Serbs will call me crazy, some will ask if this guy is for real, but hey, I am sure they are crazy for bringing this situation out of control – that’s where I am at right now. And I deserve a fully scaled rehabilitation. I do love even those that made wrong decisions in the past in America and some there are scared because they believe things are irreversible – so they may vouch I must be brought down for good without a chance for change, still we can negotiate for gift of life allows it and the understanding of it is crucial. We cannot talk with terrorists that are favoring the status quo situation of public terror. This what I am saying only sounds deep, though everyone can grasp that except those Serbs that are breathing down my neck and wanna 'geet' somebody – me in this case - for reasons known to them only. Do not let ‘em. Rednecks of America are the true army of gentlemen in comparison to them. True that. God bless.