WHEN FEAR ENTERS YOUR BLOOD

Psalm 17:8

my life in serbia is just misery. instead of wasting my time writing what serbs are doing to me, i could’ve been having the time of my life, however, unfortunately i have to protect myself by writing about stupidity and aggression. whenever i try to stand firm on the ground there are thousands of those aggressive serbs who “feel me” coming forward to take me down. for instance, finally, i’ve found an outlet to put some portion of my art collection on sale and it is called kupindo.com (some kind of serbian eBay)

today, i broke my golden rule – always shun stupidity. and thus i answered to one provocative question from kupindo user: travijana. nevertheless, it turned out that travijana reported me to kupindo authorities for putting up two images that according to her (i found later it was her) were not related to the item i was advertising. first off - if i did not reply to her inquiry, i guess she would have been still guessing why these images were posted. in the same fashion if llewelyn moss did not return with a jug of water for a mexican guy he would have been still alive. finally, i told her to stay the fuck away from my auctions. this brought on her vengeance claim. it turned out this person is some very poorly talented (tinfoil art) amateur “artist” snezana velickovic selling her “stuff” on kupindo and i would never give her a totally undeserved advertising here if she did not put my life on the line by putting down her claim. what further bothers me is that most likely this individual is related to the management of one serbian museum in cacak (where she also lives) which should have provided funds to buy this piece out, but they cannot, so they are trying everything to discredit me and deroute any possible negative thoughts far from their incompetence. i am willing to be a tough cookie and not willing to sacrifice myself for anything this angry incompetent people here are trying to do. in addition to that, there are three things: judging by her last name, she may be related to the serbian “mother” - ceca – aka svetlana raznatovic velickovic. let me put it this way, i would rather be saying out loud something bad and nasty about obama in front of white house than thinking anything – read my lips: anything bad about ceca and confessing it to anyone at anytime. this is the fear that has been holding me back, this woman is so dangerous that i probably would die from fear by just being around her vicinity. this much about the gradation of fear and possible criminal outcome with respect to anything. secondly, the “artist” velickovic i am talking about “studied” her “art” in montenegro which is a hotspot for criminal gangster activity in the region and i immediately recognized that she felt connected to some gangsters by the way she was making her claim. the third, half an hour later i got a very suspicious strange email from someone trying to buy one of mine books. i pleaded with that person to stay away because i soon realized that his and travijana’s feedback are connected with same posters. it was obvious that those two were related. and of course once they purchase your item they get your street address which means they know where you live! and by doing that, by reaching for an address, my natural response is - if they are going to do me more harm than George W.'s administration did - then the world should know about it and what is going in serbia. and as you can see, entire serbia is chump change in comparison to nevada, you are just a bite away from your fate, it's not just the devils cannot reach you:

of course, no sooner than later, guy bought my item and requested to meet with me in person next week! by the way, it was not the owner registered with kupindo for the user name: battlefield93 (whose initials are S.P.) – but someone signing himself as joca while utilizing montenegrin spelling for serb words! then he required from me to write him to blackwater63@gmx.com i mean blackwater!!!

i mean George W!!!  your administration got me into this mess. let’s get it over with. this life an't worth living. fucking end your dirty job. even though, i won’t talk trash on ceca, because this would definitely kill me no sooner than later, but perhaps in the most perfidious way possible. i still feel americans are more merciful in sending out death. and here am i writing because i did not abide to that golden rule a.lways s.hun s.tupidity. or, in other words, if i have to die, you can bet your ass i would rather die by an american hand. don't let me keep on guessing assholes. fucking do me.

last minute: march 15th 2015: just as i had a premonition. battlefield93 – and whoever it really is, has found out about this blog and i got bombarded by information about my seminal disloyalty to serbia and their american-serbian foundation and "artist" velickovic. it feels like a deep conspiracy. it feels like the tentacles of terror that belong to american and serbian system of harming selected targets (in addition to gangstalking) do not want to release the hold of me. it feels as if every time i start living they are out there for some regression and arrested development. they just could feel i relaxed myself a bit and catch me off guard to draw me back into the gunk. they are the experts. now, next to wasting my precious time, i found out that velickovic's boyfriend is the member of special operations serbian military police battalion cobra (kobre) and that her family is of military background. i believe this is not a lie. i am thinking half-literate square-headed killers with enormous amount of testosterone and braggadocio and some martial art skills that even protect serbian president nikolic. it really feels as if there was not a moment of peace in the last eleven years spent in serbia. i’d rather be in drug infested mexico than in crime-on-all-levels infested serbia. as soon as i got out today, releasing a guard just a bit, sun-visor down, my eyes felt sniped with lasers again. i saw some suspicious vehicles in my way, perhaps those were serbian cobras. they are allowed to listen to your telephonics, the least dangerous of all things they do to you - so they know your whereabouts for this is a banana-land. medical report depending on the amount of current pain is what follows so i can support my assertions.

last minute: march 16th 2015: military occupied highrise (occupied mostly by the military members) on vojvode stepe street, # 141: lights from the upper floors apartments directed straight into my bed. these lights were not visible following my apology to all serbs (inclusive of military) here on blog from few days ago, but as soon as velickovic family military background and her cobra boyfriend came into light, these lights were on high intensity again, like never before, i suspect these are some powerful laser lights. i could not sleep last night at all. this is the view from that building, and it is what i am saying - those with military background and right equipment can easily dial you in straight through your window

last minute: march 16th 2015: i also believe after the night that followed the posting of this original post (march 14th, 2015), someone set me up with throat cancer which i got by way of inhaling something airborne, perhaps some dust. boy was my death wish quick. i can feel it in my lungs too. i won’t say how i think it was possible until i confirm i’ve got one. now it feels sort of as super souped up sore throat condition – a sore throat “on steroids”; i can just feel it is something more than just that, something abnormal.
last minute: march 17th 2015: Saint Patrick's Day: i wish everything here was a bad dream. i keep asking myself what did i do to these people. was i ever a threat to them, was i dangerous at any time so that they had to unite most of the nation to bring me down? was i supposed to be some example? why? why all this hate? mad, crazy looks… why mad, crazy looks? i wish that someone explains to me what is going on? i keep pinching myself, i still feel i am dreaming nightmare. why do i have to die. why do i have to get cancer or be handicapped and/or mutilated alive? whose responsibility this - in lack of better term – gangstalking – is? i did not ask for it! i did not do anything to provoke anyone at anytime. i did not go around shouting i wanna die, or please serbs gouge my eyes out! THE ONLY LOGICAL EXPLANATION IS – I AM BEING SACRIFICED! if you read carefully my blog here you will find that i was only concerned with my well-being by looking at actions of people i was coming across on daily basis, i was not asking for trouble. SOMEONE has brought this evil up on my ass. just today i was contacted by two friends telling me they no longer want to do trade with me citing money issues, but the real problem is fear that something like this does not happen to them or their families, because nobody knows who is factually in charge of all this, i can just feel they are powerful enough to destroy life. i do not know who want to escalate this situation, instead of calming things down i feel someone is either trying to destroy me physically – cancer / mutilation – and/or bring more gangstalking into the play. crazies and copycats are now more frequent to put more insult to an injury. at what point i can defend myself. about 50 year old crazy man who was waiting for public transportation suddenly jumped in front of my car today pointing his finger in disorderly fashion as if commanding get the fuck out of here, or he may had something in his hand, it was so fast i was unable to see. he looked completely crazed to me. it was fucking scary. and this waiting game, was i being poisoned with cancer or not is fucking exhausting. i just know my eyes hurt like hell. the only thing that brings a bit of fresh air and little relaxation from stress and problems is writing here…i feel no good can come out of this. i believe these are end times as if the world is coming to an abrupt end.

i have no hopes anymore about anything

last minute: march 24^th 2015:

if they do not have nice opinion about you, people hate when you are popular. that is why you have bodyguards, esp. when you are popular and there is a great amount of hatred involved. i am not popular, i am infamous. however, i can only be popular for writing this blog which is not a reason for achieving any popularity but you know right now i feel as if my eyes are cut in two by the laser beam which i have seen. this is more than just hatred, this is harming people, handicapping people. they were targeting me from somewhere, left or right, i could see the beam and then i could not figure out because i was not expecting it from that direction but when i looked, when i was driving forward approximately 60 yards away there was a friend of mine from childhood, we did not speak in a long while, he was standing with somebody in the middle of street. he was known for similar kinds of excesses so i could have expected it from this guy and it is a strange feeling because i would never be doing this to anybody just targeting their vision and making people blind, that’s crazy man. with the pain in my eyes for the next half an hour i was wondering could it have been him? he is a friend now of the guy i made my apology to, and out of principle i won’t mention his name again this time. and even saying sorry does not help, i saw some people i openly said sorry to, they were probably scared that i had guts enough to talk, now they behave like true and thorough monsters.

i see a black dot that is not supposed to be there; there is a real nasty feeling in my eye. there is a fire in this smoke. i feel as if serbian mafia sets its target on me. i do not think they feel or realize i am a human being. they are completely irresponsible they do not fucking care. you can buy these motherfucking lasers it is like three bucks a piece and you got yourself a weapon that can destroy somebody’s vision from a mile away. it is not like in america here you cannot even compensate and sue the motherfuckers. the system of justice works more like a vendetta, it is the only way you can truly compensate, because it is my understanding that courts do major harm to innocent victims sentencing them to hefty sentences while the real scum gets off easily.  

explaining serbian hatred:

they could hate me if i was american soldier which indirectly i was by subscribing to selective services, i still do not understand. the biggest serb of them all was fighting serbs and was in fact turkish vassal - kraljevic marko, a figure larger than life, but fought serbs. i did not fight serbs so where lies the problem? by analogy perhaps if i had fought serbs i would be the hero here too. in all honesty i do not understand these things, why do they hate me so much -