fuck my enemies!

soon after I returned to serbia from the united states, a legendary yugoslav actor Toma Kuruzovic came to my house carrying some materials he wanted translated. i remember breezing through these pages but much later on - it dawned on me that it was a scenario of things that were going to happen to me in serbia, as these texts described what happened to those accused of crimes in ancient Greece; those individuals were either gruesomely tortured or poisoned to put it simply. following their executions their bodies were used in human anatomy practice by doctors. although I had not been accused of crime I came to realize that serbian society is trying to make-believe as if I was. something similar to Kafka’s play, the only thing this was the reality. In serbia I had been feeling like a lamb sent in for slaughter by Americans. as to why out of many possible things - while in America, I made some public comments about how beautiful were paula zahn and renee chenault and those observations may had been the two deadly guilts I was made to pay. I learnt the hard way that some things in America are not as they appear to be, some things you just cannot do without dealing with the consequences. surely, in serbia they awaited me as someone who was supposed to be dismembered as a punishment for some serious crimes done in the united states and that was how the majority of serbs were treating and dealing with me from the very beginning trying to spin things in order to destroy me and not to give me a new life. I had option of running away from serbia for the second time but to my misfortune I decided to stay and hold my ground. how far this Serbian madness goes I can only vouch that as recently as this year some unknown individuals have been following me around for example in public transportation or in the waiting lines dressed and stylized with some really bad make-up work to remind of some figures from the Serbian underworld. they were obviously instructed to raise my attention by coming in plain view in front of me and making some noises or taking quick and disturbingly erratic sips of their drinks. It is in my habit as david grohl or lars Ulrich once stated to "consume magazines" so Im pretty well informed of what goes on throughout the world as well as serbia and I could connect dots by simple logic and knowledge and so I know about what goes on in Belgrade or philadelphia as much as George Anastasia does. the only difference between me and George is that I did not make career out of writing on crime. But too, serbs do not want to admit that I am the artist either. My response is fuck my enemies! and their response is: let’s get him destroyed! why would someone try to spin anything on me to make me feel worried or wondering, or even guilty?! I am sure cia sent me to serbia to get me killed. Why so, I have got no clue?! Was I guilty by association? Do not know. and yes i am the member of the international association of journalists and so on, member of the USTA and so on, but i am not the criminal! so what was the point if a young person dressed and set to look like a son of the well known Serbian singer connected to underworld comes before me trying to disturb me by acting up all weird. What is he trying to make me think. Or similar. there must be some evil craziness in these, should I say well, organized actions. several days ago I was standing on the street speaking to a neighbor when behind my back I heard someone inhaling the spit loudly and then almost doing the spit-take (with just spit) all behind my back. by the neighbor’s face I realized that even to him it was unusual and bothering as he looked at whoever was doing it quite bedazzled. I waited until that person passed by and lo and behold it was the same guy who had presided over the Serbian and American friendship society, actually the same guy who started the serbian spitting spree when many serbs spat at me in Belgrade during at least the time period of two last years. it is another neighbor so to say. couple of days ago a kid age ten spat at me in disgust thanks being to the efforts and legacy of this guy. I was watching him goose-stepping away in full vindictive confidence and then I realized from observing his body talk that he was in for more than a spit legacy – perhaps someone behind all these crazy things happening to me in Belgrade – some of which I described above. supported by network of many ex members of  "the sluzba"